June 12, 2014

Obedience and Sacrifice

 It has been so long since I have posted on my blog.  I've been wanting to write so many things, but like the multitudes, I struggle to balance my life and long for an extra 4 hours in each day.  Yesterday, however, I experienced the climax of a story which I felt I needed to share.  So, this may be the blog which gets me blogging again!

Recently, a friend of mine was devastated to find out she lost the diamond on her wedding ring.  She is blessed to have a good marriage and loves to be reminded of this fact when she looks at her ring.  After thinking of all the places she could have lost it that day, she was not very hopeful she would ever find it.  About a week later, I spoke with her briefly.  She was very upset about some financial burdens and the missing diamond was still troubling her heart.  How could she replace it without the financial means?  I felt a deep stirring in my own heart.  I just knew how much this meant to her.  

After she had left, I looked down at the ring on my own finger.  Not my wedding ring, but that of my grandmother.  My knuckles have been slowly getting larger over the years and it was getting next to impossible to take it off.  I often thought about having it re-sized or putting it away for a while.  As I looked at the ring I heard, "store up your treasures in heaven."  I thought, I wonder if one of the diamonds on my ring would fit hers.  At first, I thought, "sure!  Why not?!"  And then as I pondered it longer I began to think about "why not."  There were several reasons why I shouldn't, but most of them came from an earthly perspective, and out of fear of what some would say.  I decided to think and pray on it for a while.

A few days later I was having coffee with this friend.  The thought was just burning inside me and I knew I had to offer.  I thought, maybe it won't even fit and that will be my answer, but I need to offer.  At first, she said she couldn't take it.  After I explained that I felt God was asking me to do this she accepted,as one of the diamonds looked to be the correct size.  Unfortunately, I had sprained the exact finger it was on a couple weeks before and, as it was still swollen, was unable to get it off. I promised, as soon as I could ease it off, I would get it to her and she could find a jeweler to work some magic.  For days I tried to get it off but I wasn't having much luck.  The problem was that the longer it stayed on my finger, the longer I had to think of why I shouldn't give it up.  I knew it was just a diamond.  I could make something wonderful from the rest of the ring.  I already had a plan to save the last two diamonds and gold for my daughter.  Finally, I just had to get it off.  So, with a bit of oil, and quite a bit of pain, I managed to free my finger from the bondage.  I placed the ring on another finger so that I would still have it on me, as part of me was slightly fearful that it might go missing somehow.  

Another couple days passed and I thought, this is silly, I will just put it in my jewelry box until we meet again.   So, I opened it up to see all sorts of "valuables" which I never wear, and probably never will.  I began picking through tarnished silver, gold that needed cleaning, broken chains and a few more items. The only things that really had value to me were the items which my husband had bought me.  They represent to me much sacrifice and love.  I reminded myself that I was, at that very moment, suppose to be getting back on track with my devotional life, and was wasting time.  Just when I was about to close my jewelry box, I noticed a necklace which I forgot I even had.  It had no sentimental meaning to me, but it did have a diamond the same size as the one in my ring.  I picked it up and heard God say, "this is your sacrificial ram, just as I provided for Abraham."  Now, I know that giving away a diamond doesn't even come close to sacrificing your own son.  I don't want to belittle Abraham's inconceivable conflict.  I would never compare the two to be equal, and I know God was not suggesting this either.    However, I was somehow comforted by the correlation of Abraham's story and my own.  I was grateful for God's love, understanding and faithfulness for myself as I struggled.  I asked him, are you sure?"  I questioned if I was hearing correctly because it seemed too easy.  He asked me, "would you still be willing to give up the ring?"  I said, "if you asked it of me, yes."  He answered, "give her the necklace."

I was delighted with this turn of events.  While I knew I could joyfully give the ring to my friend, it did sadden me that I was sacrificing something my grandmother specifically wanted me to have.  However, if God wants to bless someone through me, if he asks for my obedience, I don't ever want to say no.  The act of love is far more valuable than the object itself, and the possible negative repercussions.

I've already decided that I would like to keep the necklace after and give it to my daughter.  I don't think I will ever replace the diamond in the middle of the gold circle.  I think it will stand as a great reminder of how obedience and loving others can come at a cost, but it's worth it.  Just think about how much my friend will be reminded of God's love for her each time she looks at her ring.  What a better way to remember our heavenly bridegroom than looking at a wedding ring.  The idea of the empty gold circle also reminds me of a saying they have in my daughter's class this year: "Focus on the doughnut, not on the hole."  The symbol of this necklace will also be a good reminder for us to be grateful for what we do have, and to not focus on what we don't. 

In the beginning, as this story was playing out, I purposely did not share it.  I did not want the story to become about this good thing I was doing.  It is most definitely about how great a thing God is doing!  When the adventure took an "Abraham like twist", it became even more than that.   I felt I needed to share the story.  I want everyone to know this God who leads us and guides us;  to know this God who cares for us-whether we are a giver on his behalf, or a receiver of his blessings.  God wants us to listen for his guidance and instruction.  He wants us to walk with him daily.  He led me through this short journey and, in the end, I consider I am the one who has truly received the best gift.  Blessing my friend with a new diamond is a good feeling, but hearing from God and seeing him at work is a present I receive with the greatest joy.


I want to encourage you to listen for God's voice, to feel his heart.  He led me down this path when I hadn't even been searching for it, and he wants to lead you too.  Be open to follow him in obedience, as hard as it may be.  I believe, at the end, the reward will be far greater than the struggle you may face.  Be adventurous and take a moment to ask God, "what should we do today?"  There is no need to fear his answer.  He promises to walk along side you every step of the way.

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