Baptism, Obedience and a Love for God

A few weeks ago, after 5 years of God gently nudging me, I chose to be adult baptized.  I wanted to share the testimony I read that day.  It was a difficult task for me to write this.  In fact, if I am to be completely honest, I dug my heels in all the way.  It wasn't until I came to the closing lines of my testimony that I was actually excited about my baptism.  The process helped me see why I was taking this step and changed my perspective on the whole event.  I could have easily talked about the many things God has done for me and the details of how my relationship has deepened with Him over the years.  However, I felt that this testimony was meant to be about my obedience, the reason I was taking this step, not how I got here. Writing this testimony was a blessing to me.  I pray that it will be a blessing to others as well.

I was raised in Christian home, and I always considered myself a Christian.  However, looking at my faith now, I think differently.  I spent the first 20 years of my life riding along on my parent’s faith and beliefs.  And, while I understood there was a God, I certainly wasn’t living for Him.  A year or two after I was married, my husband and I agreed that we should attempt to find ourselves a home church. The idea may have spurred from a sense of tradition or the desire to have a Christian home for our own children one day, but at the root of it all, I believe it was God seeking us. 

Once we had made this decision, it was amazing that no matter where I was, physically or spiritually, God always seemed to put someone in my path to draw me closer to Him.  He always found some way to touch my heart and keep me searching for His – even if I didn’t realize it was Him.

It amazes me how, over the years, I have come to learn new truths.  There have also been lies revealed to me which I once believed.  It delights me how God took the foundation which my parents laid for me and built upon it; and it brings me joy that God has used me to support my parents on their journey of faith.  It makes me hopeful that my own kids will start out with an even better foundation than I did and have an even deeper love for our Father.

God calls each of us personally.  One day we have to stand up and choose what we believe and who we follow.  I couldn’t ride the coat tails of my parent’s ideas.  I had to seek Truth for myself.  

Though, I have always called myself a Christian, now I prefer the title of disciple.  Instead of just having faith that there is a God, I now have a relationship with him.  It is amazing how different this is from just believing the Bible is true.

I grew up in the United Church, and as is their tradition, was baptized as an infant.  I participated in a confirmation ceremony at 12 years old.  Even though I always considered my being confirmed as a declaration of my faith, for the past four or five years I have felt God nudging me to get baptized.   I figured I was covered and to be honest didn’t really want to take this step.  I didn’t feel it affected my relationship with God at all.  Since I chose to listen to the voice that gently persisted, I see things in a different light.

I am being baptized today, first and foremost, out of obedience to God.  He has called me to take this step.  God has been patient with me, while I spent so much time rationalizing away the idea.  Today, I am pushing past all the self-placed roadblocks, all the excuses, and I am being obedient to what God is asking me to do.  After all, if I love God as I say I do, and He has asked something of me, should I not be obedient to Him?  Not only that, but should I not do so joyfully?  It is not a chore, but a privilege to be able to stand up and say that God is my creator, my leader, my father, my friend.

I am also being baptized because I do not believe I was a true follower of Christ when I was confirmed. I want to stand up and proclaim that I am a child of God; that I desire to live for Him.  I don’t want to waste this life He has given me.  I want to make each day count, even if in some small way.

What it all comes down to is that I love God.  I want to continue to follow Him, to grow closer to Him.  I don’t have any expectations of how being baptized will affect my life or how it will change me.  The only thing I do long for is that my relationship with my heavenly Father will continue to deepen, that I will love Him more each and every day, and that my small role on this earth will bring Him glory and honour.

Another Lesson in Patience

Recently God has been reminding me of how patient He is...and how patient I am not.  Now, by earthly standards, I've been told I am very patient.  However, from God's view, I still need some work.  He has also been reminding me of how He answers prayer, and follows through on His promises.

I have been leading a study group for over three years now.  Before I dove into the challenge, I spent some time praying about what the group would look like, what our focus would be.  I felt God leading us in the direction of His love.  We were to learn about it, accept it, then share and spread that love.  When no one seemed to be signing up to come, except one marginally obligated friend, I was disappointed and began to question if it had been God I was hearing. Then He graciously gave me a dream about the group.  I was leading the study. Every time I looked up from what I was reading there were more and more people in my kitchen.  It got to the point where I began to worry there wasn't enough room or food for everyone.  When I woke, I was pretty sure God was confirming that this was the path I was to take and that He would grow the group.  Soon, I would be amazed at how many people were attending. 

A few hours before our first meeting was to be held, I received a phone call from another friend.  Although she thought she was calling to check in on me, it turned out that God had wanted her to join the group.  And so, there were three members.  The next meeting we were up to four people.  I was excited to see the word God gave me coming to fruition.  But the numbers stopped growing and I didn't have to refurnish my home to fit a huge crowd.  I continued to lead without worry - God would bring  those who needed to be there.  We dove into a book.  I figured by the end of our first year together we would be sharing God's love with others and spreading it around like wildfire.  Apparently that wasn't exactly God's plan.  While I am sure, individually, we often projected His love to others, as a group we didn't really reach that stage until the end our our third year together.  It was amazing how it just seemed to happen, how one person's heart infected the rest of ours.  Everything just fell into place and we began organizing ladies events for the women of our community.  I laugh now when I think back to that first year.  Seeing things in hindsight, I know we would have never been ready to take these steps after a year, not even two.  God invested three years in us and patiently waited for each of us to grow and be ready.

The other thing that happened was our group did grow.  We now have six official members, but there is more to our numbers than our bi-weekly meetings.  We had so many volunteers come to help us out with our last event, it was amazing!  And at the end of the afternoon we even had attendees asking if they could help out at the next event!  So, while I may not have an overflow of people in my house, God has increased our numbers - just not the way I had expected, and not as quickly as I had anticipated.

I am so glad that God is more patient than I am.  I'm pretty sure my group members are too!  I still struggle with my need to hurry things along, but I can rest in the knowledge that He is always at work.  I am trying to let go of my own expectations and be confident in the promise that God always comes through.  I am attempting to become more patient, remembering that His vantage point is far better than my own, and His timing is perfect.